Learning from hardship and tragedy
Written By Jason Murguz
as told by Grandmaster Kim Soo
Last year Chongjae-Nim spoke to me and Mr. Pete Nuygen about
several times in his training when he learned from either his own hardships or
the hardships of others. I have written
before about how important it is to take correction from instructors in the
proper way, and to understand that our instructors only want us to learn the
true way or Do. As we get to the Black Belt level the thought
may be that we know it all and don’t need correction. Chongjae-Nim’s experiences show us that
students can learn just as much from their own hardships and the hardships of
others if they are attentive and patient.
The first
instance that Chongjae-Nim told us involved him being beaten up or “slapped
around” as he described it by some people from a different university. In his story he said he was walking on a
campus while wearing another school’s colors or logo. Some students saw this and approached him,
slapping him and giving him a hard time.
“I was 3rd
degree Black Belt at the time, and I didn’t know what to do. Should I kihop, or get into some formal stance? I went home and cried in my bed. If we were in the Dojang, I would have
defeated them, but out there in the world I didn’t know what to do. So I came up with practical self-defense so I
don’t have to worry about a stance or anything like that. I just react.”
Chongjae-Nim took a situation that was embarrassing and
instead of dwelling on it he innovated an new form of training so that not
himself, but others could learn a more complete art form that would be useful
in their everyday lives. The next
memory that Chongjae-Nim shared with us involved sparing in the dojang.
“I remember
sparring with another student who happened to be cross-eyed. Because of this, whenever he would round kick
I wouldn’t be able to tell if he was kicking high or low. If I blocked high he would hit me low. If I blocked low he would hit my face. It was so frustrating. I went and I cried in my bed. I wept and
thought, how am I going to handle this?
What can I do? So I came up with
Scissor Block , or round kick block.
Next time in class, he would kick but I didn’t care where because I
could block any where he could kick with new block.”
Again Chogjae-Nim took a situation that defeated him and
made it into a stepping stone to success and knowledge. Finally I will relate a sad story that
Chongjae-Nim shared with us that changed how we practice practical self-defense.
“I had a black
belt student that really got into scuba diving.
He would go all over the world diving in different places. One day he was sitting in a bar or restaurant
minding his own business and didn’t notice a man watching him. It turns out the man was looking at his Rolex
watch. The student finished with his
food and drinks and left. While he was
unlocking his car he was hit in the head with a tire iron by the man who had
been watching him. He was in comma for a
while and then he died. I was very sad.
He was a black belt student. So I came
up with practicing practical self-defense with the defenders back to the
attacker. That way when the defender
hears a sound like a clap or a kihop, the defender turns and reacts. I want my students to always be prepared and
ready. This was a very sad situation, but out of it many people learned a
valuable lesson.”
I think it was this
last statement that has stuck with me the most.
Chongjae-Nim wants us, his students, to always be prepared to defend
ourselves if the need arises. He also wants his students, to learn from their
defeats, weaknesses, and short comings.
We often learn much more from our failures than from our victories. I know for me personally, not breaking a
brick on my first try at my Black Belt test stuck with all the way until I did
break one during my 2nd Dan test. Breaking that brick meant so much
more to me than succeeding the first time. Sometimes, it is in our failures that we find
our greatest successes.
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